So, I was a little apprehensive about wanting to write this entry. Basically, everything in my life is really good right now, and I didn't want to write something like this, and everything come crumbling down. But, I like sharing things with you guys. I feel happy seeing that someone has read what I wrote. Even if you don't comment. :) But yes, for once in my life, everything is almost/close to perfect. I got Alex is my friend again, Michael and I treat each other like we're dating and that makes me really happy. My friends are great. My life is great. I'm actually happy. And thats good right?
Sometimes, I feel like I shouldn't be happy. It seems like every time that I am, something, or someone, comes along and has to ruin it. Like, sometimes people say things about me, that AREN'T true. Typical rumors right? It's a part of growing up though. Dealing with 'Haters.' Sometimes we just have to turn the other cheek. But, when your friends believe what is being said about you. Thats rough. That makes it difficult for things to be ok, and your you to be happy. When it feels like there is no one there for you when you need someone the most. But eventually, things will work themselves out. I guess what I've been trying to say, is, be happy for now. While you still can. Because, as much as I hate to admit it, it goes away. Nothing lasts forever. No matter how much you try to keep it around, it goes away.
Lets talk about something else now. How many of you believe in love at first sight? I do. I think that me and the guy I'm kind of with belong together. We are SOO much alike its not even funny. But the sad part, I'm scared to even think for a second, that i might love him. I feel like if I say it; or think it; it might happen. And one way or another, I'll end up hurt. But what if I do? Love him, that is. I don't even know anymore. Maybe I should just give up. Thats what I feel like doing anyway.
I'm not too sure about what happened today. In school I was happy. Smiling. Laughing. But as soon as I got home, I didn't want to do anything but cry. Like, what was that? I still feel like that. Thats why the end of ^^ that was all like, sad, and down. Ugh. Maybe I'm depressed. That seems to be what everyone thinks. My friends know when I'm faking a smile, when I'm on the verge of crying. They. Just. Know. I don't understand it. Maybe thats a good thing.
more to come.
~Invisible Girl
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